1.5 Pies... the art of impromptu (Ricotta Pie, Cappuccino Cream Pie)

I found myself with 2 small containers of cookie scraps today-- just enough for another pie! Thinking of some kind of filling that could complement the strength of the cookie flavors (dark chocolate, chocolate, and butterscotch pudding), I landed upon a ricotta pie recipe with almonds and tons of chocolate. Well that wouldn't do anything for me--other than give me more chocolate cravings-- but I figured a light, spiced ricotta filling wasn't such a bad match for a double-chocolate crust.

So I pulsed in a food processor:

1 1/2 15oz container, lightly packed cookie scraps (see flourless cookies)

until sandy, added 1 tbsp water and pulsed 5 times more.

Then I pressed the dough clumps into a pie pan and prebaked at 350F 5 minutes long

(Afterwards I left it to cool while I made the filling)

For the filling, I blended (by hand):

15oz pckg fat free ricotta

3/4 cup sweetener

and added

1/2 cup + 1 tbsp room temperature eggbeater, 2 tbsp at a time 

Then for the spices:

1/4 tsp butter extract

1 1/2 tsp cinnamon

1/4 tsp nutmeg

1/4 tsp salt

I poured the filling into the prebaked cookie crust and baked it (using an aluminium cover for the crust) for 40 minutes. Afterwards do remember to let cool for 1 hour and then refrigerate for 3 hours more (cheese filings need time for the flavors to meld). I had a slice and it was super yummy. The whole pie is around 870 cal (depending on the cookies you used for your crust, I used mostly the 10 cal chocolate fudge cookie recipe), which is quite obscene.

However, I ran out of chocolate ice cream--which I didn't think would be a problem as I had frozen yogurt (homemade, Dukan friendly) in the freezer to replace it. But when I tried out the froyo, i realized that it was absolutely disgusting! It was as if something was off... how long does yogurt last for in the fridge? I did have it there a week before making the froyo; perhaps yogurt doesn't last very long without preservatives. Well I was very annoyed because I want my pie with ice cream, and I didn't have any silken tofu in the fridge. But rummaging through said fridge I did find cream cheese and I had fat free cool whip in the freezer, so I decided to make a topping for my (one slice eaten) pie. Fashioning a partition with aluminium foil and part of the cool whip packaging in a very amusing way (wait til you see the picture), I blended

6 oz fat free cream cheese, room temp

1/4 cup sweetener

and added, 1 tbsp at a time

3 tbsp instant coffee mix (made with hot water and then cooled)

2 tbsp unsweetened cocoa

1/4 tsp salt

and folded in 

1/2 8oz pckge fat free cool whip, thawed (4oz)

and poured it over my pie. Impromptu cappuccino cream topping in 15 minutes!

my make-shift partition, held apart by the plastic that sealed the cool whip container!

Yummy 'Garbage Casserole' and dark chocolate ice cream

I'll say it as it is: sorry Dr Dukan, but I highly doubt I will ever convert to a healthy way of life. I will just re-invent 'unhealthy' recipes so I can eat them whenever I want without getting fat. The thing is, I hate carrots quite as much as I like decadent pies warm and topped with slowly melting ice cream. Which is a lot. I have little doubt that I will be living off these dessert recipes... pretty much forever; except for the artificial sweetener, that is--due to general dubiousness, I will be subbing to Splenda Sugar Blend as soon as allowed.
Speaking of ice cream, I made one to top my pumpkin cookie dough pie. I love ice cream; I probably mentioned it already, but really you can't imagine how much I LOVE ice cream. The problem is I don't have an ice cream machine--but I was leafing through David Lebovitz's blog the other day and I came across his 'how to make ice cream without an ice cream machine' tutorial. The key takeaways?

my current frozen edition: homemade rose yogurt and silken tofu

a) remix the ice cream to break up the ice growing at the edges every 1/2 hour or so in the freezer (5 times)--but my freezer is sooo warm, it took an hour for ice to even start to form. Thus, 3 remixes and then I fell asleep.
b) use a thick ice cream base, which is less likely to become icy.

 The moment I read the word 'thick' a light bulb went off. Thick? Silken tofu is thick! I can make ice cream! So I got together my trusty (crappy) Hamilton beach (yes, that crappy) food processor and blended

16oz silken tofu
1/2 cup cocoa
1 cup sweetener
1 tbsp espresso powder
2 oz alcohol-- I used 1 tbsp vanilla essence (mine is 46% alcohol), 1 tbsp chocolate essence (also alcoholic), and--don't laugh-- 2 tbsp mirin. Which is, just so you know, a supposed to be a flavor enhancer.

until smooth. I poured the mix into an aluminium foil container, covered it with plastic wrap, stuck it in the freezer, and every hour (though the recipe said half hour) broke up the ice that formed at the edges and stirred the mixture until consistently creamy. Unfortunately, the one hour wait meant that 3 hours later, it was 1 am and I fell asleep. So my ice cream didn't freeze, and is very much ice cream--but is quite icy. Sigh. I still have it with my microwaved pie, though-- 2 slices of pie + 2 giant scoops of ice cream a day for only 340 calories: that's for lunch and dinner, and I must make myself race out the door in the morning so I don't have it for breakfast too!

oooh yum... just a side note, the green is the inside of the cookie crust (the pistachio section lol), that didn't bake until brown

As for the casserole, I found myself with 1/2 a vegan ground meat sausage thing which I couldn't tolerate just cooked on its own. And just over a cup of garlic pasta sauce and regular pasta sauce leftovers. And that 0 calorie shiratake fettuccine that Dr Dukan has on so many recipes (I get it from Olivenation). And so forth.

So I set the oven to 350 F, and took my only (very deep) frying pan and cooked:

1 lb ground 95% beef
1/2 vegan ground 'meat' sausage (Oh Lean or something like that)-- or you can just use turkey
1 medium onion diced thin


until no red showed and the onions were cooked through. Then I added

dried parsley, basil, pepper, and salt
12 oz pasta sauce (or if PP, use 1/2 cup milk with 1 tbsp cornstarch stirred in beforehand, and add 4 oz fat-free cream cheese--that's what I should have done)
7 oz package shiratake fettuccine, rinsed under cold water and chopped roughly in thirds
8 oz fat-free shredded mozzarella

Stir until combined (or until, like me, you decide it is 'combined enough').  Then wrap the handle of the frying pan (if not oven-proofed) with aluminium foil and bake for 40 min. Or you can use a casserole dish. But that's one more dish to wash!

It looks a bit strange but is yummy and creamy and super filling. I shall try next time with meatballs!